tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-71231269211100903912024-03-05T20:36:21.942-08:00Blue's BlogBlue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.comBlogger118125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-52870538224086400282014-12-26T19:49:00.005-08:002014-12-26T19:49:50.148-08:00I Don't Celebrate Christmas. 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through my house<br /> Wasn't shit going on because I don't celebrate Christmas. <br />
<br /> My socks were on the floor because I threw them there<br /> In the hopes that maybe tomorrow I'll feel like doing laundry.<br />
<br />
The cats were acting shady in the shadows of night<br /> Just to trip me up when I tried to go to the bathroom.<br />
<br /> My woman in her afro and I in my drawls<br /> Were watching crappy sci fi movies from the library.<br />
<br />
When outside my door, there arose such a clatter<br /> Who's that peeking in my window?<br />
<br /> Pow. Nobody now.<br />
<br />
The EndBlue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-82165719610800335482014-12-26T19:46:00.000-08:002014-12-26T19:46:25.644-08:00Have Merthy<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
Thanks to Tekhen for finding this on the internet. :) <br />
<br />
A new poem by Blue entitled "Have Merthy"<br />
<br />
Hath he not given uth<br /> enough laughs to lath<br /> a lifetime? Doeth hith unique<br /> fathe and voith not offer<br /> retributhon enough<br /> for the ear he hath bitten,<br /> the women he hath hitten,<br /> and the skullth he hath splitten?<br /> There onth wath a time and spathe<br /> when we yelled hith name<br /> in the threeths. A time when<br /> he wath the champion<br /> of the world. And <br /> we were confident<br /> that there would be no other.<br /> But alath, he ith now the meme<br /> that reprethenth a void.<br /> An emptineth.<br /> A relinquithing of reathon <br /> When we have<br /> nothing<br /> intelligible <br /> to thay. <br /> Even Robin Giventh hath<br /> moved on. <br /> Have merthy. <br />
<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-51253670321305769692014-12-16T13:35:00.001-08:002014-12-16T13:36:31.750-08:00Differentnessness"Different" people exist through the world, being who they are for no particular reason, getting pointed out for various reasons by people who are struggling to come to conclusions about their own life experiences. Different people are shamed for not admitting that they are different, as though they are expected to see themselves from the perspective of someone else's insecurities. "Allies" think that by calling themselves "allies" they're doing "different" people a favor, not recognizing that "different" people are only a "problem" because the "normal" majority insists that "different" means "wrong". What if the "different" person wasn't trying to fight the "normal" people? What if the "different" person wasn't on another "side"? What if this person was just eating breakfast? What if the "ally" simply said "I'm different too?" Then, we could all be different and unique and live life every day watching the sun come up and go down while eating good food, dancing, singing, and loving each other. And when we live in this kind of love, we can see clearly what's really going on:<br />
<br />
Bullies want everyone and everything to cater to them and their worldview in order to feel a sense of control over their own lives. People become bullies for all kinds of reasons. Some were abused or violated early in life. Some were indoctrinated. Some grew up in a homogenous environment with no understanding of diversity. Regardless of the bully's history, the ultimate goal is control. When that sense of control is violated, the bully attacks. If there is no one to attack, the bully self destructs.<br />
<br />
I was an abused person who aimed to gain control of everything around me in order to prevent anyone from violating me. With the help of loving friends, I quickly discovered that this only hurts other people. I didn't want to be a bully, so I began the process of learning to set boundaries, make choices that result in the type of life I want to see, and take control of my own destiny. Today, I strive for enlightenment within myself. It is an uncomfortable process, marred with failure and embarrassment. But with each awkward failure, I become more comfortable with awkward failure. To be comfortable with awkward failure is to be free to make mistakes while others are watching. This is true freedom and liberation from oppressive cycles.<br />
<br />
I found a way out of the bully cycle. It starts by looking inward long enough to recognize that life has nothing to do with what I think. Furthermore, no one else's life or lifestyle has anything to do with me. I have to create and intentionally live the life that I want and if I don't, I'm the only one responsible for my misery. It's ok to be wrong. If I discover that I am wrong, I will not die. I will live to be wrong tomorrow.
We are all different. We are all unique. We all live differently, wake up at different times, work different jobs, eat different foods, wear different clothes, have different friends, seek different help meets, have different parents, grow up in different households with different sibling dynamics, have different health concerns, grow hair in different places with different textures and colors, come in different sizes, have different shapes, have different skin tones and textures, and respond to different strokes. There's no such thing as "allies" when we're not fighting a war against bullies. Because bullies are not a real threat. They're just afraid of their differences.<br />
<br />
Love,
BlueBlue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-68896186661389534052014-10-21T14:25:00.002-07:002014-10-21T14:25:39.276-07:00Pedicabo MundiI had just finished writing The Tao of Pimpin' and decided to start
working on an album for a label I wanted to work with. So I went to
Joseba's house and said "help!" and he said "ok" and I recorded this at
his studio. Then, I didn't release it. Last night, I realized that the
only way people would understand the creative direction I'm headed in is
if they heard the context. Because not too many people have read the
book. And hearing a song is easier than reading a book.
<br />
So to catch people up to where I'm at in my head in order to prevent
their discomfort when I have to respond "go masturbate, you harmless
inchworm" to their requests that I say or do something other than what
I'm saying or doing for no other reason than to appease their
insecurities, I present to the world PEDICABO MUNDI! It's Latin for
"fuck the world."
<br />
<br />
The concept of this track is a play on Aguas de Marco. A lyric heavy
Brazilian Portuguese song that I learned in order to increase my
Portuguese vocabulary. Matt, the guy who owns the label I spoke about
earlier, suggested that my version of Aguas de Marco would sound
something like this. I thought that was funny, but I wasn't going to do
it...but I couldn't help myself. Suggestion is a powerful force. And
really, the suggestion just helped provide a framework for my inevitable
"Fuck Everything" themed art project.<br />
<iframe style="border: 0; width: 350px; height: 442px;" src="https://bandcamp.com/EmbeddedPlayer/track=2814637090/size=large/bgcol=ffffff/linkcol=0687f5/tracklist=false/transparent=true/" seamless><a href="http://battlecryofthebutterfly.bandcamp.com/track/pedicabo-mundi-fuck-the-world">Pedicabo Mundi (fuck the world) by Blue</a></iframe>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-47350470173782977242014-10-21T14:01:00.000-07:002014-10-21T14:01:01.181-07:00Eastern versus Western philosophies and Taoism<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
Yesterday, I wrote about the difference between Christianity and
Buddhism with marginal eloquence. Today, I'm going to attempt to write a
succinct distinction between Eastern and Western religious traditions
and then juxtapose Taoism from the more cultural forms like Buddhism and
Hinduism. It will be short. Maybe. <br />
Western religious traditions
and philosophies function under the idea that the individual is alone
on their own path toward a particular goal. That others are stumbling
blocks, competitors, or helpers on the path towards one's own salvation.
One implication of the ultimate dichotomous reward of eternal life or
eternal damnation is that each person is on their way towards one or the
other, so the Westerner's goal is to separate herself from wrongdoers
and coalesce with the righteous in order to increase her likelihood of
being on the side that doesn't spend eternity wailing and gnashing their
teeth. Westerners are more likely to eject a perceived wrongdoer from
their family or community in an attempt to improve their chances of
avoiding an afterlife of endless suffering that is assigned by a single
Godhead who presides in judgment over all living things. The Godhead is
stern, ultimately fair, and wants the best for his followers. However,
his judgment is absolute. The Catholics have found a way out of the
dichotomy by creating multiple places where people can go, like limbo
and purgatory...neither eternal happiness nor eternal damnation, but
some space in between. I do, sometimes, wonder what God thinks of all
this. But I digress.<br />
In contrast, Eastern religious traditions
emphasize interdependence or collectivism. As a result, the fate of
families and communities is intertwined which creates a sense of
accountability and collective movement towards an inevitable outcome: a
perpetual changing of seasons and circumstances that are the effects of
causes. In Eastern traditions, there are concepts of continual process,
birth-death-birth cycles, karmic forces, and an inability to escape
one's connection from every other living thing in nature. The
individual's evaluating force of good and evil is represented in types
of karmic forces: like a bank of good and bad deposits which are
distributed throughout a person's lives as they pursue their personal
path towards enlightenment, which could arguably last forever if they
never reach it. This takes the emphasis off of looking at others as
causes for good or bad in one's life, and places the emphasis on one's
own choices, disciplines, and behaviors. Instead of a single Godhead,
there are many higher beings who exist to challenge or assist the human
on their path toward enlightenment. This eliminates the absoluteness
dichotomy, presenting all sentient beings on various points of a
continuous path towards enlightenment that they will all ultimately
reach. <br />
In Taoism, there is no good and there is no bad. There
are just causes of effects. Furthermore, the emphasis is not on a
transcendental future of bliss or enlightenment, but on right now. The
perpetual inner dialogue of the Taoist is "How am I doing right now?"
Many Westerners are afraid of Taoism because it seems to suggest an "if
it feels good do it" kind of irreverent hedonism that would disturb the
hierarchy. However, this is not the case. The Taoist is an
interdependent member of nature and does not exist to her own end.
Anything that would be experienced as "karma" is happening to the Taoist
in the moment, should she choose to pay attention to it. The Taoist
could choose at any point to let go of all attachments, in which case
she would no longer be subject to karmic forces. Her existence is
already absolute and functions under the laws of The Tao, or The Way.
Life, death, and suffering are accepted as natural and all that is left
is what is. This makes Taoism seem like a cheat and leaves Taoists being
accused by Westerners as "defeatists" and Easterners as
"irresponsible". The Taoist holds that the human's desire to control and
manipulate nature is a futile display of ego, since nature provided the
human with the tools and the rules by which to "manipulate nature".
Humans of the Eastern and the Western traditions seem to follow a
human-centric model, arguing that we are responsible for doing things to
make the world better. Taoism sustains that the world is just fine and
humans, should they relinquish their desire to control and manipulate
their surroundings, namely others' experiences, would simply operate in
harmony with nature towards whatever end nature was headed toward
anyway. A great analogy for this is a tsunami. Human ego can think that
the tsunami wouldn't really do all that damage, but the water doesn't
care what humans think. The idea that the human doesn't win over nature,
or that a particular sect of humanity doesn't win over another sect of
humanity is a very scary idea to competitive Westerners and disciplined
Easterners. However, since the Taoist knows and accepts that nature
ultimately wins no matter what humans think, she doesn't take the human
ego seriously...not even her own. But also, the Taoist understands that
humans are just another element of nature. So since nature wins and the
Taoist is in harmony with nature as nature, then she knows that she
wins. <br />
In summation, Westerners run races with each other to get
to heaven (hence, the existence of "race"), Easterners sit in lotus
positions and chant in the hopes that the perpetual noise will prevent
negative karmic thoughts and get them to enlightenment faster, and
Taoists don't do shit. <br />
Disregard this next paragraph. It's about
African philosophies compared to Taoism and since I didn't put this
topic in the introduction, you shouldn't read it. Taoism in its purest
form, explains nature as an earth-centric event. Water and other natural
phenomena are frequently used in Taoist texts to describe who nature is
and how The Way governs earth's nature. This makes Taoism easy to
explain to Western audiences. In contrast (but not really, as these
things all work together and the goal isn't to beat each other, but to
explain to children why they should just do what their parents tell them
to), African traditions in their purist forms deal with nature as a
cosmic event. The larger cosmic experience of nature allows for a
greater understanding of possibilities, widens the playground, and
includes the interaction and interdependence of nature with respect to
its infinite influence. If the African refrains from attachments, the
natural Way becomes the interdependent experience of all infinite
possibilities existing in all living energetic forces throughout
multiverses. For the Taoist, 1+1 is arguably 2. For the African, or
Kemetic philosopher 1+1 depends on what is being added and by whom. For
the Kemetic philosopher, time and space become unyielding infinities
that go from microcellular energy to macro universal energy while all
are the same experience replicating and influencing itself. Energies
become much more influential than the sensual experiences humans are
aware of. It is easy to think that this would lend itself to
superstition, but superstition is developed out of attachments and the
need to control outcomes. <br />
At the end of the planting season, if
any member of any religious tradition could relinquish control and live
in the moment, their philosophy would work for them. It really doesn't
matter what you believe. Just get on with it and be happy.<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-89933089543218452522014-10-21T13:59:00.001-07:002014-10-21T13:59:01.960-07:00Me as a Motivational Speaker<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
My
young family members told me that I would make a better motivational
speaker than Hill Harper (who, though cute, bothers me simply because he
has 2 last names. I find that obnoxious). <br />
My platform: how to
do you and win! Stuff about how quitters make the best innovators by not
getting attached to either outcomes or institutions, but remaining in
so far in the forefront of creative thought they they are never in a
place longer than they need to be, remaining fresh, enlightened, and
transformational in both their leadership and perspectives. Stuff about
how competition is for chumps because if you're doing you, you don't
have time to know what somebody else is doing. Stuff about how progress
is an illusion, so it's best to make your world better now, which has
the residual effect of making the world better for everyone around you. <br />
Many motivational speakers emphasize opportunity and preparation:
taking advantage: being in the right place at the right time...all the
mumbo jumbo that makes a person believe that if they're not kicking it
with the popular folks, they'll never amount to anything. I disagree
with all of that.<br />
In fact, the most innovative and
transformational leaders are folks who are surrounded by mayhem or
stagnation, yet are able to quiet their minds long enough to see the
missing links. Then, they create something that changes history's
landscape. With this paradigm...the paradigm of paying attention to
needs that aren't met...the leader is no longer concerned with being in
the right place at the right time. She is the opportunity provider and,
therefore, every place is the right place and every time is the right
time. <br />
Many motivational speakers emphasize the necessity of
competition: looking at what the next guy is doing and working to go
that much faster, harder or stronger than them...never giving up and
getting the gold. I disagree with all of that. <br />
Competition is
for show. And if there is no field, there is no competition. The most
transformational leaders are not the players on the field, but the
providers OF the field. They created the point...the reason we're all
here to begin with. They set the rules and gave the competitors an
opportunity to show the audience something fantastic. The real
transformational leader knows that competition only exists when there
are many working toward the same goal. But there are many things that
must be done and by not competing and comparing, she is able to clearly
see the more valuable goal that everyone is missing. <br />
Many
motivational speakers emphasize working hard and trying: rising early
and staying up late to be the first guy and the last guy on the scene. I
disagree with all of that. <br />
Why work hard when you can just
consistently do great shit? Do what only you can do every day and
eventually, you're the best in the world. Doing eliminates trying.
Furthermore, when you're just doing what you're doing, consistently, you
are able to regulate. You can get up at the same time every day, get
your work done, eat a great breakfast, lunch, and dinner, play with your
cats, and smoke all of the weed in Fiji while still accomplishing more
than the guy who burns out after a year of sleep deprivation.<br />
<br />
In conclusion, wash your ass and be yourself. <br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-63045627998760631302014-10-21T13:58:00.000-07:002014-10-21T13:58:15.161-07:00Christianity versus Buddhism<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
I was raised Christian and I've always been fascinated by its ability to drive people mad. I've also been fascinated by Eastern religious traditions since I learned that they existed. I've been practicing Buddhism for just under a year now and through deeper study and practice, I've noticed some differences that haven't been pointed out to me directly. I'm sharing them here for those who may be interested.<br />
<br />
This will be succinct because I'm getting ready to go wash my
hair and that's going to take a while, so no time to waste. This is
simplistic. There are way more differences. But hopefully, this will
help to show an element of the fundamental difference in processing of
the Christian vs. the Buddhist experience. <br />
Religious systems
help people collectively process impermanence and ultimately, our
mortality. We're all gonna die. And our lack of knowing the details
about that leaves us searching for answers. So religions, when practiced
collectively, provide us comfort through faith as we march closer and
closer to the grave. <br />
The Christian Story<br /> In Christianity,
developed out of the Hebrew tradition, death is fundamentally bad. It is
the punishment for sin, or wrongdoing. As a result, death is something
that must be prevented. According to the apostles, through Jesus Christ,
a man who lived from around 30 CE until 63 CE who demonstrated endless
compassion, Christians are able to find eternal life and avoid death.
Then, they can find the kingdom of heaven, which is popularly recognized
as a place in the sky where the body is renewed and lasts forever in
eternal bliss. <br /> The Christian person believes that if she devotes
her life to Christ (which means accepts Jesus Christ as Lord and
Savior), she will reap the eternal reward of everlasting life. Her path
is personal and her salvation is uniquely hers. Furthermore, those who
are not Christians or who do not devote their lives to Christ represent
the ultimate fear that Christians have: eternal damnation. Out of this
dichotomy arises judgment which helps (and I frame it this way
intentionally) the Christian to evaluate good from bad and refrain from
the path of the unrighteous. If a Christian does wrong, she must repent,
but forgiveness is also promised as a result of Jesus's ultimate
selfless life sacrifice for the sins of the world. <br /> As a Western
tradition, Christianity functions hierarchically, placing a king or
Godhead at the top and various members of society at successive rungs on
the ladder of righteousness. Christianity was historically used to keep
women and slaves (or employees, depending on the master's disposition)
in line and keep masters and husbands from abusing their servants or
each other. The Christian tradition is easily transferable to Western
society. It is the model of having a king that rules all things and
delivers rewards and punishments to people who either obey or disobey
his commands.<br />
<br />
The Buddhist Story<br /> In Buddhism, developed out
of India, suffering (as opposed to death) is considered bad and should
be avoided. impermanence and interdependence are accepted as fundamental
parts of the sentient being's experience. A sentient being is
recognized as a being that has transient life. Some Buddhists believe in
a soul. Some don't. It depends on the school. Since impermanence is
recognized as a part of the sentient experience, there is no expectation
that the human (or any other being) will last forever in its form.
Interdependence implies that though beings are wrapped in individual
packages, enlightenment (also known as Nirvana or deliverance from
suffering (among other things)) is only achieved all at once among all
of us. So no one is enlightened unless everyone is enlightened. This
creates a system of accountability for others beyond ministry because if
I'm not enlightened, you won't be enlightened. There is a dichotomy of
good and bad based in the 8fold path and 4 noble truths (google them).
The more good stuff you do, the better a person you become and the less
karmic crap you have to deal with, but ultimately, it's in everyone's
interest to do the best they can. <br /> The Buddhist person believes that
it's better to do good than bad. Enlightenment does not happen in a
place outside of the life that we live now, so suffering is
predominately the result of attachments to greed, anger, and stupidity.
At any moment, the Buddhist could simply do good and not reap the karmic
consequences of bad, living in Nirvana and helping others to also find
Nirvana (or as close as is possible until everyone reaches Nirvana
together). The people who have reached this enlightenment are called
Buddhas. There are over 180 different Buddhas in the history of
Buddhism, so people choose which Buddha, or role model, they follow
based on their personality type. Death is real, but in the paradigm of
impermanence, death is just something else that happens. Essentially, a
person could exist forever in suffering if they don't achieve
enlightenment during their life (or lives...some Buddhists believe in
reincarnation. Some don't), but why do that because it would just
prolong the suffering. <br /> As an Eastern tradition, Buddhism functions
linearly, relying on each member of society to play his or her role
towards the ultimate realization of Nirvana. Since there is no real
hierarchy, there is no competition to get to "the top." A person of a
lower class or caste may be dealing with previous life karma, so this
creates a climate of acceptance of certain social dispositions. This
also makes Buddhism more appealing to higher caste/class members of
society: if you're doing socially well, it's the result of your good
karmic practices, eliminating guilt for benefiting in a world full of
suffering. However, due to the nature of interdependence, the Buddhist
is not off the hook from helping others to achieve Nirvana. <br />
In
summation, Christians believe that this life is it. People make mad
dashes to Christ to keep from going to hell before the buzzer. Buddhists
believe that we're all in this together and that it all ends, but also
all begins again and again. So there's no pressure to do anything in
particular. <br />
Hope this helps.<br />
<br />
Love,<br /> Blue <br />
PS.
This is not an invitation to tell me that I didn't talk about African
traditions. It really doesn't matter what you believe. Just get on with
it and be happy.</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-39521062321061170682014-10-08T16:04:00.000-07:002014-10-08T16:04:11.107-07:00All Labels Are BadThere's no static label or category that would describe the
experience that more than 1 single human being on the planet has had.<br />
I wouldn't say "I'm proud to be an American" nor "I'm proud to be
African American" or anything like that. I'm no more proud to have had
ancestors forced from their home land into bondage than I am to have
ancestors who fought and created a new culture that is bitten by
everyone in the world as a result of being forced from their homeland
into bondage. I don't feel that this is anything to be proud of. My
experience on Earth is no more or less great than anyone else's. In
fact, considering the short amount of time I'll be on this planet
(relative to the existence of the planet), I don't find it useful to
gain pride in the contextual elements of my physical body. If I will be
proud, it will be of my participation in a Universe that is constantly
moving and changing. It would be in my own experience that is constantly
moving and changing; an experience that is unique from that of every other
human who shares my skin shade, nose width, hair texture, or
reproductive characteristics. Were I to die tomorrow and return in another
dimension as a creature that looks or behaves completely differently, would I be less than I am now? Of course not. I am still a part of the
ever changing dynamic Universe that takes form in order to selfishly
experience itself through itself.<br />
<br />
But am I not what others
consider African-American-Woman? To them, I am.
But when I awaken from my dream, I am none of these things. I am
whatever my dream sees. Sometimes, I am a man. Sometimes, I am the
blackest, thickest, tallest woman in the world. Sometimes, I am an all
seeing eye, observing the interactions of mind, heart and body that my
mind imagined in its waking state. I know that because of this view
others have of my finite physical body, my person may be more or less
safe in certain areas. To care is the beginning of insanity.<br />
<br />
I
walk as though I have somewhere to go. I create as though I have no
limits. I speak as though I am not afraid. I smile as though I know that
this is all bullshit. I make friends as though friendship is easy. I
eat as though I intend to taste the greatest combination of sweets and
savories that tickle all the parts of my tongue and mind. This is not a
black experience. This is a living experience. <br />
And as a living being, I
will fight for the rights of other living beings to exercise their creativity freely
in a world where they are viewed as less-than by others who are deluded
and sick. I will not join forces with the sickly ones simply because
they have shinier stuff. It is their shiny shit that they must create in
order to prove their superiority to themselves. The Earth has provided
us all we need. What use is shiny shit? Are we so detached from reality as to neglect
clean water and air in favor of shiny shit? Have we lost our ever loving
minds?<br />
<br />
And as people of color discover their power, if they should become
oppressors, I will fight them as well. This is not a battle for power.
This is an insistence on creativity. Any force that aims to limit my
creativity or the creativity of any other living being on this planet is a
violatory force and I will not support it no matter what it looks like
or who it considers kin. Believe that shit.<br />
<br />
And believe that if
the creativity comes from a black American versus an African versus a
Chinese English versus an African Caribbean versus a foster child versus
a child raised in a blended family versus one who grew up wealthy
versus one who grew up in the projects...these differences matter and
should not be dismissed. This is a new form of art that we know nothing
about. This will give us another opportunity to either learn or retreat
further into denial. We will never know every experience. There is no
category that we can align ourselves with that will represent any of us all of
the time. If we want our story told, we must tell it and no matter how
unique, it will connect with every human experience if it is authentic
and honest. And if we must categorize things in order to wrap our puny
minds around them, then we will categorize. But if we understand the
dynamic and constantly moving creative experience of the Universe, then
we participate in the constant opportunity to change with it. If we have
a problem, we fix it! If we don't, then we shut the fuck up and have an
orgasm with somebody because this will all be over soon enough!!!<br />
<br />
Love,<br /> BlueBlue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-756091082908461522014-10-08T15:54:00.001-07:002014-10-08T15:54:49.171-07:00On "Concept Blackness" and Why it's Ruining Humanity<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
I'm
not a fan of the "concept blackness" showing up in movies and TV shows.
It's unidimensional and uninspiring. Scandal is a great show because
the concept is multidimensional. How to Get Away with Murder also has a well
developed concept. Fresh Prince, Cosby Show, and Boondocks followed the
stories of families and communities and left impressions on our global
culture. Greater dimension allows for character development and dynamic
storytelling that reaches beyond its target audience. Art that is
organized around a superficial concept is amateurish and shows how
desperate broadcasters are for content. All the money in the world won't
produce better art when artists are lazy.<br />
<br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.0"><span data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.0.$end:0:$0:0">I believe that it is good to distinguish between black art and
mainstream art and Latino art and LGBTQLMNOP art and Indian art and
Chinese art...and even to distinguish between black American art and
African art or Japanese vs. Japanese American Art...or African French or
Polish Jewish. Black American creativity is very different from African
creativity. Polish Jewish is very different from American Jewish. It is
just as dismissive to discount the history of one's ancestry throughout
migration and the creative perspective that derives from that as it is
to dismiss one's blackness in America through the "I don't see color"
eye. These things matter. These things show up. Any story that deviates from white male heterosexist supremacy is a
revolutionarily different Hollywood story. For example, Olivia Pope
would've simply been First </span></span><span data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.3"><span data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.3.0"><span data-reactid=".82.1:3:1:$comment10100571429278274_10100571639586814:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.3.0.$end:0:$0:0">Lady
had she been white. Then, there would be no scandal. It is in her being
black, and the way blackness is seen as a blemish on America's white
supremacist image that outlines the subtext of that story. Analogously, creating a great concept in the context of cross sections of social laws is to creating a concept around "blackishness" or "letters to white people" as putting a spotlight on the
elephant in the room is to pulling an elephant into a room and yelling "hey!
Look at my elephant! Now fund my indiegogo campaign."</span></span></span></span></span> <br />
<br />
When Issa Rae created Awkward Black Girl, I sent money to the kick
starter campaign because her perspective was comedic and relevant. Her
webisode sparked a movement of heavy handedness that was needed at the
time to counter the fear black people had of showing human flaws. It was
perfect and it set the greater culture up for the modern stories of
multidimensional humanity lead by characters that represent our
experiences. I champion that trend.<br />
<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-2917797424865303802014-10-08T15:40:00.001-07:002014-10-08T15:40:08.560-07:00The Problem with WomenYou know what's wrong with you women? Ok. I'll tell you:<br />
<br />
You
think that if you look like the next best thing on the magazine cover,
it's going to increase your likelihood of finding happiness and love.
Bitch, please. If you can't be happy fat and nappy, then you can't be
happy skinny and blown out either. Your looks have nothing to do with
your happiness...but happy bitches be fine as hell because happiness is a
good fuckin' look. If you want to be happy, do what the fuck you<span class="text_exposed_show"> want to do with the people who want to do that shit with you. Fuck a magazine cover.</span><br />
<br />
<div class="text_exposed_show">
You know what else is wrong with you women? Ok. I'll tell you:<br />
<br />
You compete with other women for EVERYTHING! That's dumb ho shit. What
the fuck are you competing for? What the fuck is the prize? And if you
get it, do you think that it will still be there if you slack off for
even a second? If you do, you's a crazy bitch. Stop competing and pay
attention to what you like. Then create that shit. That's what you're a
woman for. You create. Women create. That's what we do. That's what
we're for. That's how we're made. So please, stop the dumb ho shit.<br />
<br />
And you know what's REAAAAAALLLLY FUCKING WRONG with you women? Ok. I'll tell you:<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg3txsHT1kkuQadH6BY-jqmibVNKiDJxtrS3-IYFPaMUMnTB7q4TYWxmO_jJe1HHTGei3gsPWArE-qQZsFKfoDt-0iELOEjrMYzysM4ueHz00QOUt5A9iff3_NmqS3ltjrQ3jQIZTMfc4U/s1600/063009SteveHarvey001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg3txsHT1kkuQadH6BY-jqmibVNKiDJxtrS3-IYFPaMUMnTB7q4TYWxmO_jJe1HHTGei3gsPWArE-qQZsFKfoDt-0iELOEjrMYzysM4ueHz00QOUt5A9iff3_NmqS3ltjrQ3jQIZTMfc4U/s1600/063009SteveHarvey001.jpg" height="175" width="320" /></a>
You will turn to every fucking source in the universe for information
about how to get a man or lose weight or find happiness outside of the
source that you have right betwixt your ears. Stop letting these crazy
assed dudes tell you how to get into heaven or how to get a man in 20
days or how to cut fat in half. Bitch PLEEEEZE! Muthafuckas have made a
living off of telling you what the fuck to do with yourself. There is
literally an industry designed specifically to make you feel bad so that
fools can sell you shit you don't need. Now tell me this...and
uh...tell me this: with all your self-help booklets and pastor
anniversaries, has your life actually improved? Go 'head. I'll wait.<br />
<br />
If you want the job or the man or the weight loss or any of the other
shit, you've got to do the work. Ain't nobody ever lost weight reading
about how to lose weight. Go dance. Go cook. Join a sport club. Mentor
some teenagers. Teach a step team. Work at habitat for humanity. Do
standup. Read your poetry at the next open mic. Learn to play the bass.
Babysit one of your single mother friends' kids for a few days. Get your
head out of the ignorance that is your stagnation and join creation
with the rest of us who are bustin' our asses to try to help you
understand that you're beautiful just the way you are. Kill them
insecurities. Yes they should die. And I hope they BurN in HELL! <br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-3963477373706697112014-10-08T15:36:00.002-07:002014-10-08T15:36:28.537-07:00The Problem with Men<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi693xoSF7oItKr3EhBblj9uT6ChgCmjgUnKTdJNNV7zdX5Hhnm-TYbcl7iArDeQ_deiidmBzF2vpglY7FI-uJYeMMMcJCztik0aClBHGHKAGfDX1wDnrM_d-7AWuVMGtBQhNmvFWbVu2v3/s1600/Ray-Rice-690.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi693xoSF7oItKr3EhBblj9uT6ChgCmjgUnKTdJNNV7zdX5Hhnm-TYbcl7iArDeQ_deiidmBzF2vpglY7FI-uJYeMMMcJCztik0aClBHGHKAGfDX1wDnrM_d-7AWuVMGtBQhNmvFWbVu2v3/s1600/Ray-Rice-690.jpg" height="272" width="400" /></a></div>
<span id="goog_1076932322"></span><span id="goog_1076932323"></span><br />
You know what's wrong with you men? Ok. I'll tell you:<br />
You
think that because you find someone appealing, they're supposed to be
interested in meeting you. WRONG! WRONG! You might be ugly as hell and
nobody wants to look at your face. If you want someone to find you
appealing, you have to BE appealing to THEM. Not just find them
appealing. <br />
Know what else is wrong with you men? Ok. I'll tell you:<br />
<div class="text_exposed_show">
You think women give a shit what you look like. Look: women are
perfectly fine having a poster of Djimon Hounsou on their bedroom wall
and masturbating to it every night. We're so good with the mentals that
we can create an entire fictitious relationship that keeps us absolutely
content for the rest of our lives. In fact, unless you look like Djimon
Hounsou or Dwayne The Rock Johnson, you will never live up to our
standards of beauty, so forget about it. Outside of our vivid
imaginations, women respond to how someone makes us feel. But in order
to make a woman feel good, you have to observe that woman and what she
responds to. This takes time and intention. Every woman is
different...just like every man is different. And you have to actually
appreciate the woman for who she is. Then, you can give her exactly what
she wants and she will love you in return. <br />
And you know what's REAAAAALLLY wrong with you men? Ok. I'll tell you:<br />
You think that you can just talk your way into the panties. Look: if
you can talk your way into panties, then you're gonna be in a ho's
panties. And if you get a ho, don't be all on facebook complaining about
women this and women that. Tell it like it is: hos this and hos that.
Stop comparing women to hos and stop thinking that just because you
don't know the difference, all women are hos. If you want a real good
woman who's going to cook and clean and birth your babies barefoot in
the kitchen all by herself, then cut the umbilical chord and clean up
the mess herself, then you need to cook, clean, and be prepared to
raise, educate, finance, and protect your family while you're holding
her from the back and massaging her feet as she births them chilluns.
Then, build a deck, patch the roof, cut the grass, clean the basement,
and take her to Jamaica once a year. <br />
If you want a life partner,
you have to be a life partner. If you want hos, you need to get your
pimp game right. Half assing either of these will leave you alone and in
the cold complaining about hos on facebook, then getting "likes" by
more hos that you have no idea what to do with. <br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-69665736481709372672014-09-24T10:15:00.000-07:002014-09-24T10:15:55.774-07:00These 5 Things<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijQ-e3Fln-Xl8HFbT9Hb6IVT05YDfiPDQZRlY4kCfc5JoRyZnKuPceDLsgx6kFNwZ3g6OrSoFms367RTaql3oz5hQDl8d0P9gGOZycG-bpyWTKcdC_z0XIaaWrqqWff2IUJj5ajhFX4BBm/s1600/safe_image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijQ-e3Fln-Xl8HFbT9Hb6IVT05YDfiPDQZRlY4kCfc5JoRyZnKuPceDLsgx6kFNwZ3g6OrSoFms367RTaql3oz5hQDl8d0P9gGOZycG-bpyWTKcdC_z0XIaaWrqqWff2IUJj5ajhFX4BBm/s1600/safe_image.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
"the air wreaks of burnt fire, and inside we're piercing flames...the burning of <a class="_58cn" data-ft="{"tn":"*N","type":104}" href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/mikebrown?source=feed_text&story_id=10204475453827442"><span class="_58cl">#</span><span class="_58cm">mikebrown</span></a>'s memorial just makes us more focused...its an illusion meant for distraction. don't fall for it. staying focused." </div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
-a friend. </div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
<br /></div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
When I saw that Mike Brown's memorial was burned to the ground, I was immediately reminded of the aftermath of <a href="http://www.pbs.org/wnet/jimcrow/stories_events_reconstruct.html" target="_blank">Reconstruction</a> and the days leading up to the Holocaust. I don't take such history lessons lightly. These days, it's not as clean cut as black and white. Furthermore, people don't just go around lynching people and getting away with it (unless they're police officers and the victims are black). But no one has to touch you to destroy you or your family. Pay attention. </div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
<br /></div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
This post is not intended to encourage or make people feel good. If you want to feel good, go get a massage. This post is about paying attention, being strategic about your life and safety, and doing what you need to do to survive based on what you value and not what public opinion tells you. News reports are skewed over time. You know what happened and you know how you feel about it. Trust your gut. </div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
</div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
Furthermore, this post is not eloquent. If you want eloquent, read <a href="http://www.brainybetty.com/2007Motivation/Khalil%20Gibran%20-%20The%20Prophet.pdf" target="_blank">The Prophet. </a></div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
</div>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
1. Trust What you Know: Simply pay attention to what's going on around you. Don't let anyone
convince you that you didn't see what you saw. Don't let anyone tell you
that you didn't hear what you heard. You know what you saw. You know
what you heard. You also know who brought water versus who fanned the
flames. <br />
<br />
2. Everybody Is Not Your Friend: Stop posting social media memes just because they look clever. It
is skewing your perception of relationships. Those who love you the most
won't necessarily be there all the time. Those who love you the most
will hurt you sometimes. Those who love you the most will not always
agree with what you say and do. If your idea of love is people who agree
with you or tell you how wonderful you are all the time or are always
in your face, then you are setting yourself up to be deceived by the guy
who was trained in college to tell people they're beautiful and
wonderful all the time because that's how he makes his money. The
people who love you are the ones you seek out when you're traveling
because you know that you're welcome at their home. The people who love
you are the ones who will make sure you have something to eat when
you're hungry. The people who love you are the ones who interrogate you
whenever you make a decision they don't understand. If you're not
confident in your choices, that's a personal problem. Stop throwing away
the best friends you'll ever know in this life just because some meme
on facebook told you to. In fact, get off of facebook if you can't tell
the difference between reality and a facade. <br />
<br />
3. Some People Intend You Harm Even When You've Caused Them No Harm: When people show you
who they are, you can believe that. People will tell you who they want
you to believe they are. But when they show you who they are, you can
bet your bottom dollar on that. It is not mystical. It is not intuition.
People are showing you who they are all the time. Stop making excuses
for them. If they will burn your grave, they will burn your body. <br />
<br />
4. Protect What Matters: Take care of yourself and your family. When Hitler was on the rise
in Germany, many Jews stayed behind in the name of tradition and
culture. Many, however, got out. Einstein was one of them. These people
were dispersed, but they survived. The survivors were able to meet up
again later and form comedy troops and write sitcoms and invent things.
If you are so tied to community that you forget to protect yourself and
your family, then you are co-dependent and addicted to an idea. It is
human instinct to self preserve. If you are violating your nagging
instincts in the name of "community" then you will not make it out in
time.<br />
<br />
5. Know Your Values: What you have is not an indicator of who you are. What
you have is a bi-product of what you value. If you have lots of stuff,
then this is evidence of what you value. If you are constantly
surrounded by loving wonderful people, this is evidence of what you
value. Neither is good nor bad. But don't plant watermelon seeds and
expect an apple tree. Nobody else's opinion matters. You know if you're
happy or not with what is around you. Furthermore, if you are attracted
to people with lots of stuff and then discover that you are not valued,
please stop being surprised. <br />
<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-79091715958536493782014-09-24T09:09:00.001-07:002014-09-24T09:09:29.065-07:00Need a Black Leader?<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
Dear Black People,<br />
Whoopie Goldberg has been carrying The View for nearly 10 years,
pulling an Emmy for best talk show host and 3 NAACP Image Awards since
she set foot in the studio. She is now the host of (arguably) the most
influential and socially responsible daytime talk show in America. Not
to mention that she is one of only 11 human people in the history of
Hollywood to win an Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, and Tony award (EGOT).<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0Wl_FSFrErCqWZ4AICNMcHOb9CeyYCbTyCibrYcKTjg8atCAir6TpxbZpjBbmDOuQyp1MMksPt7S3RMgLNrUOVWPAa1ivKvHt25MCYCNf7Z4tFDRxhbRFvwB75cKN5tNc-IFOPMTRLSU6/s1600/article-0-0D75DBF2000005DC-358_634x444.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0Wl_FSFrErCqWZ4AICNMcHOb9CeyYCbTyCibrYcKTjg8atCAir6TpxbZpjBbmDOuQyp1MMksPt7S3RMgLNrUOVWPAa1ivKvHt25MCYCNf7Z4tFDRxhbRFvwB75cKN5tNc-IFOPMTRLSU6/s1600/article-0-0D75DBF2000005DC-358_634x444.jpg" height="224" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sensei Whoopie Goldberg</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Whoopie Goldberg, Nikki Giovanni, Alice Walker, Oprah Winfrey, belle
hooks, Debbie Allen, Phylicia Rashād, Angela Davis, Jamala Rogers, Karla
Scott, Vetta Sanders-Thompson, Janet Helms, Laila Ali, Michelle Obama,
Nicole Avant, Patricia Bath, Mary J. Blige, Majora Carter, Debra Martin
Chase, Misty Copeland, Marian Wright Edelman, Thelma Golden, Bethann
Hardison, and many others are alive, working, serving their communities,
leading, and looking much younger than their years would tell.
Furthermore, their skin shades, hair textures, and institutional
affiliations are irrelevant because their work speaks to the people they
serve in meaningful ways. Even further, they can all exist without
competing with each other because they all have unique skills, talents,
and contributions to society that they all celebrate and support among
and between themselves. <br />
If you're a black woman or man who is
too sexist to follow a Black Woman, continue to lose hope and cry for
black leaders. If you're awake and understand what's really going on in
the world, join the team by lending a hand to the common cause of
keeping the species alive and inspired.<br />
<br />
"The View is the show that everyone has copied. But we are the original." <br /> -Sensei Whoopie Goldberg<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-69711181102503129792014-09-23T14:42:00.002-07:002014-09-23T14:44:04.128-07:00Happy Bisexual Visibility Day! <div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP-QuklUIRHX2GqDrilnw2uMokiLY5JSNn114DPC_KL7_Soa2DQISxfubjNF0vpAEIO4-b4ITx3Jy7S1cDEm-jir-ptFVRDZnc9t7cWvya12nwVIjts8e9Ajwr3mVNE6FUTA6-UkRTcA_6/s1600/10636209_10152424284422075_5374767404185126618_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP-QuklUIRHX2GqDrilnw2uMokiLY5JSNn114DPC_KL7_Soa2DQISxfubjNF0vpAEIO4-b4ITx3Jy7S1cDEm-jir-ptFVRDZnc9t7cWvya12nwVIjts8e9Ajwr3mVNE6FUTA6-UkRTcA_6/s1600/10636209_10152424284422075_5374767404185126618_n.jpg" height="400" width="400" /></a>I
discovered recently that squares become offended when they don't know
whose genitalia you are willing to rub on. I never quite understood this
except that it seems that squares are very insecure about their
decisions and the people they decide their decisions with, so us folks
who don't have those problems are seen as threats. Who knew? right? <br />
But now that I know, I make sure that everyone knows whose genitalia
I'm rubbing on. I am one of those folks who only likes to rub on one set
of genitals at a time. And frankly, I plan to be rubbing on the same
set of genitals for the rest of my life (well 2 sets, if you count
mine). <br />
But alas...there is still a dilemma. Those who see the
genitals I'm going to be rubbing on for life assume that they can
possibly sway me away from those genitals and into the genitals of
another (because they're narcissistic and selfish). This wouldn't be a
problem except that the framework leads to the assumption that I'm
interested in rubbing a certain type of genitals. So as a result, the
people who recklessly flirt at me are sadly disappointed when I don't
respond in the way that they would have predicted. I am not the type of
person to want to attract unwanted attention just to disappoint (though
those who are attracted would respectfully argue otherwise. Who am I to
dash their assumptions?) <br />
However, I just found out from my friend <a class="profileLink" data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/user.php?id=1152256417" href="https://www.facebook.com/fabumisskbw">Kerry</a>
that today is Bisexual Visibility Day! In the olden days, when I would
only rub on penises, these types of things seemed frivolous and silly.
Like, what's the point of celebrating whose genitals you're rubbing on?
However, now that I'm rubbing on genitals that are more similar to mine,
I am learning that it makes a huge difference. The entire way that our
culture is set up is based on the assumption that a woman is always
going to choose to rub a man's genitals and a man will always choose to
rub a woman's genitals while rubbing another woman's genitals on the
side. <br />
But I don't live by the rules of our culture. I live by my
own rules. And as a result, the sooner I let people know that, the less
likely it will be that I'll disappoint them by not returning their
flirts. So thank goodness that my people have created a day where they
simply say "hey. I exist. So stop being tunnel focused and recognize
that there's more going on than your caveman patriarchal narcissistic
mentality would have you believe. That's right. I have options. Lots of
them."<br />
<br />
So I am sharing this image for 4 reasons. One, in
solidarity with other people who don't need the rules of this culture to
dictate whose genitals they rub on. Two, in order to let everyone know
that I'm in support of equal opportunity genital rubbing. Three, to pay homage to the people who struggled for sexual freedom and safety in this society, enabling me to not give a shit about what people think (a privilege that I take full advantage of). But mostly,
because I am a person who doesn't believe in pursuing a relationship
based on the types of genitals I want to poke and squeeze. I love the
person who is willing to roll with me in this unpredictable and exciting
journey called life. I love the person who is willing to care for me
and about me when I don't even care for or about myself. I love the
person who values my humanity and prioritizes my safety and happiness
above even her own. And I love her so much that I want to rub her
genitals because I'm a touchy-feely kinda person. And I don't give a
shit who's offended. Suck my balls. They're in the second drawer on the
left. <br />
Happy Bisexual Visibility Day!!!<br />
Love,<br />
Blue </div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-6259393477535633812014-09-22T17:21:00.000-07:002014-09-23T15:28:00.913-07:00Slavery vs. Ho Shit<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
There is a lot of propaganda about slavery that is circulating on the
internet. The goal of this propaganda is to get the public to believe
that all American citizens are slaves working a giant plantation that is
run by the economic top 1% of American citizens. I love a good
conspiracy theory. In fact, I have many of my own...because America
engages in many conspiracies to keep the larger populace working
mindlessly for the advancement of a global agenda that is really going
to backfire and end up a Chinese oligarchy which is fine with me because
I like the Chinese. They didn't rob the continent of my ancestors and
destroy family and tribal units over and over again through the
institution of chattel slavery and the continued irreverent use of
"urban sprawl" aka "gentrification" to justify continual community
dismemberment in order to rectify their insecurities by attempting to
position themselves as superior over indigenous cultures who had
established civilizations based in love, food, and family long before
they decided to flee British religious persecution in pursuit of
capitalism...but the sensationalism of conspiracy theories and the
spooky music in the zeitgeist videos is just a distraction that keeps
many people from making sense of their current lack of funds. In the
spirit of foundational clarity towards greater discernment of propaganda
(or FCTGDOP) I am using this status update to explain the difference
between "slavery" and "ho shit." <br />
Slavery is a system of forced
labor toward the building of an empire. A slave is someone whose rights
have been stripped away and whose punishment for violating orders is
much greater than the crime. For example, a slave who doesn't meet a
quota might get 50 lashings, or a slave who looks at massa or massa's
wife the wrong way might get killed. Slavery is an inhumane institution
that continues in many hoods where people are criminalized for simply
existing, the systemic de-creditation of their public schools leading to
inability to qualify for acceptance into higher education institutions
after high school, and the lack of investment in quality food and
planting of trees that have been shown to increase quality of life and
health within a region. This is why many cities aren't really cities
anymore, but a collection of municipalities that have different police
forces and tax bases in order to control and manipulate the people who
are living in abject poverty and protect and defend those who own land
and property. The only way out of slavery is to escape which is
difficult because if other slaves perceive that you are attempting to
escape, they will either discourage it for fear of consequences or they
will try to prevent it out of jealousy. So discretion is absolutely
necessary for an escape to occur. It is a lonely road, but once embarked
upon, the escapee learns that there is an underground railroad designed
specifically to get people to the point where they are free to choose
their own path. <br />
<a href="http://www.baileygirls.com/#!top-by-blue/c10zz" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="http://www.baileygirls.com/#!top-by-blue/c10zz" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm9_yUoXFZkvmHF5-lwyQnoWN7y9tb1H2KduOTZ9qBQrF8gqw7o63EXtGX2puwT3Q_YsTEmIvr4kUtRr0oQV8yKK6qjEsuRRa2QsEPm3_qUX0cjozLWrucVutB6p9ki_S2PDfxILBm_Q29/s1600/Buy+the+book.jpg" height="185" width="400" /></a>Which brings us to ho shit. Ho shit is part of a
dynamic process that includes a pimp, a ho, and a trick. A pimp is
someone who sells hos to tricks. Confused pimps use manipulation and
lies to accomplish their goals. Pimps with clarity employ <a class="profileLink" data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/page.php?id=1435949839982603" href="https://www.facebook.com/thetaopimp">The Tao of Pimpin'</a>.
A ho is someone who is sold by a pimp to a trick in exchange for
protection and security. A trick is someone who buys a ho from a pimp.
There is no hoin' without a pimp and there is no trickin' without a ho.
They all work together towards the realization of pimpin'. Pimpin' does
not work collaboratively. There is no family of pimps or conspiracy of
pimps. There is 1 pimp and 1 pimp can have many hos, but in order for
pimpin' to work, hos have to be loyal. Loyalty is not something that can
be forced upon an individual. Loyalty is a free choice. If a ho chooses
at any point to leave a pimp, that ho will be broke of all the
protection and security and left alone in a back alley to make new
choices. The ho is in control of hoself until the ho chooses to
relinquish that control to a pimp.<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/TAO-PIMPIN-Blue-ebook/dp/B00LZSO1FG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1405965173&sr=8-1&keywords=the+tao+of+pimpin" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="http://www.amazon.com/TAO-PIMPIN-Blue-ebook/dp/B00LZSO1FG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1405965173&sr=8-1&keywords=the+tao+of+pimpin" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3XMSrWRsFK6l3afBQIQIk9MZVI0AfCNySPxUp_a7cLUH1rfhgY1CQSM2N51plWvM_4dkQ2b7kqtaMvsG2xbrtNsLk5pqUxLSRdTBIziH8XErqUglHbkuwaeUReWAqm771SgoNcPM1K6Iy/s1600/Buy+Book+on+Kindle+2.0.jpg" height="137" width="320" /></a>So as you can see, not every
lack of funds is the result of forced labor. Many people have chosen to
relinquish their control. The reasons people make the choices they make
are vast, but if someone has a choice and chooses to give up their
rights to a pimp, this is not slavery. This is ho shit. <br />
Love,<br />
Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-23235585087458670942014-09-22T17:12:00.001-07:002014-09-22T17:12:25.863-07:00EcofeminismI learned a new word! Ecofeminism. It's applying feminist principles
to ecological issues. Apparently, there's a lot of discourse around what
this means which has lead to quite a few academic debates.<br />
<br />
I'm not a fan of terms like "feminist" or "feminism". The suffixes imply
activism. Once something is active, it is in a masculine state of being,
so to "feminize" femininity is to create masculinity, arguably the
opposite of what was intended.<br />
<br />
I prefer simply "feminine". Feminin<span class="text_exposed_show">e
implies stability, stillness, and resting. Yin, if you will. I believe
that "feminist" is preferred in this culture because Westerners always
have to be doing something in order to feel that something has occurred.
Furthermore, to refer to a man as "feminist" is more acceptable than
referring to him as "feminine" because people are terrified of sexual
fluidity, as though the worst thing a man could be is feminine, when in
fact, the most restorative state of being is feminine. Westerners are
backwards.</span><br />
<div class="text_exposed_show">
<br />
So back to
Ecofeminism. I can see why it would become another issue to debate.
Instead of allowing nature to be in its most restorative, peaceful,
still, and stable state, people want to "do something" as though
nature's ability to win or lose is somehow associated with what people
do. If we paid attention to nature, there would be no need for
"ecofeminism". Nature would show you that she always wins simply by
being herself and following her natural patterns. Then, we could simply
study "ecology". <br />
<br />
<br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".o0.1:3:1:$comment10100559092735804_10100559457923964:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".o0.1:3:1:$comment10100559092735804_10100559457923964:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".o0.1:3:1:$comment10100559092735804_10100559457923964:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$0:0">People
have to study certain things under a microscope to appreciate them. I
say begin with reverence, gratitude, and appreciation for all things. Then, as we
learn, we're simply gaining conversation starters instead of complicating things unnecessarily.</span></span></span> <br />
<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-62032249438291615462014-09-22T16:54:00.004-07:002014-09-22T16:54:44.010-07:00Let's Talk Tribal Secession Folks from privileged backgrounds want me to tell their story. I
can't do that. My mother was a whore and my father was a hustler with no
hustle. So I can't sincerely and genuinely talk about what it's like to
have problems with racism. I don't give a shit about white people, I
don't need their acceptance, and I don't want to be like them in any
way. Who do you think has the money to afford a whore who doesn't want
the community to know she's a whore? It's not the black folks<span class="text_exposed_show"> in the ghetto. That's for damn sure. <br />
A ghetto is an organized place where poor people are placed into cheap
housing without proper social services to manage the culture of poverty.
Then, they do drugs to escape their reality, have sex with tricks to
pay for their drugs, then get pregnant and make babies that they
neglect. Then, their children have to raise themselves and their
siblings which results in their inability to do well in school. Then,
the children don't graduate and they can't pursue higher education. So
they end up working at minimum wage jobs. It's a system that needs poor
people to work it. Always has been. Always will be. If "ghetto" is a bad
word, it should reflect badly on the US government for being incapable
of living up to its high ideals and, as a result, stashes its poor in
open air prisons monitored by police who keep the perimeter guarded so
that the poor people don't get into the rich neighborhoods. </span><br />
<div class="text_exposed_show">
When it's the United Nations in your house growing up, you don't give a
shit about race because you know that men just wanna get their dicks
wet and women just want to keep their reputations clear. However, if you
want to talk about systemic poverty that is racially driven from the
top down based on the history of the punk assed British who moved to
this land and pillaged every person of color they came across in the
name of "liberty," then we can start talking about a counter strategy
which will probably include education or a form of tribal secession.
However, if you just want what white people have, then stop wasting my
time. <br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-70172538474093632082014-09-22T16:49:00.000-07:002014-09-22T16:49:07.310-07:00The Bill Clinton EffectI used to think like this. I used to break down everything into its
smallest pieces to try to explain why something happened. In this video,
a guy breaks down all of Bill Clinton's facial movements to show that
this is what creates a charismatic speech. However, all those things
have nothing to do with Clinton's charisma. Clinton's charisma has to do
with the fact that he heard this woman's question and responded to her
genuinely as though he really cared about not only givin<span class="text_exposed_show">g
her an answer, but about her actual concerns and her actual humanity.
It's because for that moment, he really cared. He made her question his
concern and responded from his own experience. There are no techniques
for expressing true concern. There is no amount of narrow staring or
furrowed brow that will communicate real love when there is none.</span><br />
<div class="text_exposed_show">
I had a hard time working when I hated everybody and everything. I
still hate most people and most things, but I love my work, I love my
collaborators, and I love my audience. This subtle yet profound shift
has changed the way I view work and has enabled me to be functional and
charismatic without going through all these ridiculous steps. I am
present, I am with you, and I love what I do. <br />
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwVrWaiqsYQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwVrWaiqsYQ</a><br />
<br />
Thuggin' Love,<br /> Blue </div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-43389514861674126042014-09-22T16:45:00.000-07:002014-09-22T16:45:06.233-07:00Im BACK! This time, with Ray Rice Commentary<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
I have read a lot about Ray Rice and the tape and even saw the footage on CNN. I have come to conclusions.<br /> Here's my list of opinions by philosophy. <br />
<br />
The Taoist response:<br /> Abusers attract abusees. Then, nature takes its course.<br />
<br />
The Realist response:<br /> Some men have money and like to fight. Some women value money more than they value their long term face.<br />
<br />
The Christian response:<br /> All things work together for the good of those who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose. <br />
<br />
The Muslim response: <br /> If you want to keep your job, beat your woman at home like you got some sense. <br />
<br />
The Confucian response:<br /> Confucius say: "If you want to keep your job, beat your woman at home like you got some sense."<br />
<br />
Buddhist response:<br /> Steroids are some fcked up drugs nam myoho renge kyo.<br />
<br />
Hindu response:<br /> We are born, shit happens, we die, then we're born again. <br />
<br />
Evolutionist response:<br /> Basketball players cheat. Football players beat. The difference is genetic.<br />
<br />
Creationist response:<br /> They were made for each other. <br />
<br />
Feminist response:<br /> Men ain't shit. <br />
<br />
Black Revolutionary response:<br /> It's whitey's fault. <br />
<br />
Young adult response:<br /> Men shouldn't hit women.<br />
<br />
Middle adult response:<br /> The only reason he got fired was because there was a tape.<br />
<br />
Older adult response:<br /> He'd better sleep with one eye open. <br />
<br />
Love,<br /> Blue</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-14077638893250081702013-12-27T13:39:00.001-08:002013-12-27T13:39:56.922-08:00No Daddy! I don't WANT bitches! : On other people and their expectations<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">When I
was younger, I was told that I should want big houses, fancy cars, and
bitches. I was rarely asked "what do you want out of life" and quite
frequently asked "what are you gonna do to pay for your big house, fancy
cars, and bitches?" I never wanted a car, a house, or a bitch. <br /> <br /> My father tried to give me a car when I was in college and I didn't want it. I liked walking. I liked biking. I lik<span class="text_exposed_show">ed
nature and I didn't like bills. To me, a car was simply a bill with an
engine. St. Louis wasn't big enough to justify having a car as far as I
was concerned and I spent so much time in class and studying that I
wasn't going anywhere anyway. So I asked him "who's going to pay for the
gas and insurance?" My father said, "you are." So I turned down the
offer. <br /> <br /> Later, I was blamed by my father and his family for
being ungrateful. "Your dad got you a car and you didn't even take it.
Why are you so ungrateful?" My feelings were that this old dude who I
barely knew just gave me a really expensive bill. If that's being
ungrateful, then I'm ok with that. I also never got the bill.<br /> <br />
Other family members said, "why didn't you just take the car? That's how
he shows love?" That's beautiful and all, but I'm not going to pay
property taxes and insurance on somebody else's self-soothing attempt at
loving me. No matter how you slice it, that shit's ridiculous. <br /> <br />
I have no end to this story except that I still don't want a big house,
fancy cars, and bitches. At age 31 going into 32, I'm preparing for the
next phase of my life on a volcano with my woman, my big yurts, my
fancy Fiat, and my cats.</span></span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br /></span></span>
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show">Poetry In Motion asks: </span></span><br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".r[3cpwb].[1][3][1]{comment10100374437376624_5675084}.[0].{right}.[0].{left}.[0].[0].[0][3]">"I'm confused on the bitches. why would that have been something anyone would long to have? What was the thought behind that?"</span><br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".r[3cpwb].[1][3][1]{comment10100374437376624_5675084}.[0].{right}.[0].{left}.[0].[0].[0][3]"><br /></span>
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".r[3cpwb].[1][3][1]{comment10100374437376624_5675084}.[0].{right}.[0].{left}.[0].[0].[0][3]">Blue responds: </span><br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".r[3cpwb].[1][3][1]{comment10100374437376624_5675084}.[0].{right}.[0].{left}.[0].[0].[0][3]">"</span>It's part of the American dream: picket fence, 2.5 children,
bitches....When you have your own bitches, you're more in control of the
breeding. Bitches are also cleaner than male dogs. At least that's what
I've heard. I don't have nor have I ever wanted bitches. I'm more of a
cat person myself."Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-32807451035840708392013-12-23T18:21:00.001-08:002013-12-23T18:21:27.042-08:00I thought you were pretty and then I realized it was you! I grew up in a culture where the little girls had long thick hair and learned how to braid and care for it early. Around 14 or 15, they would cut their hair into teenage styles and/or get a perm for the first time as a rite of passage...I never wanted to grow up. However, at 17, I was sick and tired of the bi-monthly weekend hair marathon that plagued my life. Day 1: wash, oil, and braid. Day 2: press. I had to ask myself, "why in the hell am I doing all this?" Originally, I saw a perm as a solution to my problem: if the napps were gone, I could comb my hair after washing it. However, nobody told me that perm maintenance was a pain in the ass. So I decided to get my first perm and after 2 years and 3 consecutive perms, I realized that I simply couldn't stomach the smell. So the perms stopped and my napps came back...only it wasn't the hair I knew. It was coarse and raggedy. One cousin braided extensions into my head so I wouldn't have to deal with it while I was studying in Madrid and backpacking around Europe. When I tired of those braids another cousin introduced me to the sew-in. I was confused and itchy for 2-3 months. Finally, once my safe nappies returned to me, I asked a guy from my church to start my locs. I didn't know what I was doing. I just knew I didn't have time for the weekend hair marathon anymore. <br /> <br /> The scariest part of the ordeal was that during my pop culture exploration phase, I didn't recognize myself. I wanted me back. When I got locs, I felt like I got me back. It was a way for me to maintain the silhouette of "me" that made sense to me without all the work. However, During my hair journey, I learned quite a bit about people. It was an experiment of sorts, and these are the results:<br /> <br /> 1. Reactions I got when I had long thick hair:<br /> "why don't you have a perm?" or "you would look so pretty with a perm."<br /> "dang! Your hair is thick!" or "You got too much hair!"<br /> "are you mixed?" <br /> "You need to straighten your hair." <br /> "You can't go swimming like that."<br /> "You should let your hair down."<br /> "That's not your real hair."<br /> <br /> 2. Reactions I got when I had straightened hair:<br /> "You are so pretty."<br /> "I thought you were pretty and then I realized it was you!"<br /> "would you like to go to prom?"<br /> "would you like to go out?"<br /> "Your hair is sooooo pretty!"<br /> "You think you better than me? You ain't cute." <br /> <br /> 3. Reactions I got when I had braided extensions:<br /> "I want you to be my girlfriend."<br /> "Who did your hair?"<br /> Note: I spent the majority of that time in Madrid, so I didn't have a lot of reactions. I was usually ignored by non-American or non-African students and non-students. It was the most peace I'd experienced in life until then.<br /> <br /> 4. Reaction to the sew in (long black hair that curled at the ends). <br /> "Is that a weave?"<br /> "See, you're not like other girls. You know the value of hair."<br /> "You look really nice!"<br /> <br /> 5. Reactions to my new locs:<br /> "Are you a rasta now?"<br /> "Are those braids?"<br /> "Eeew!"<br /> "You look a mess!"<br /> "Why would you do that to yourself?"<br /> "As long as you're happy..."<br /> <br /> 6. Reactions once the locs grew longer:<br /> "Your hair is sooo pretty!"<br /> "What's up Queen?"<br /> "See, we as African peoples have to come together."<br /> "What do you know about the 5%"<br /> "That's not your real hair."<br /> "Who did that?"<br /> "Got a lighter?"<br /> <br /> This all transpired over the course of about 9 years from 1999-2008. My conclusion: <br /> 1. people are full of shit. <br /> 2. All I really want is to recognize myself. Every once in a while, I do. The journey continues. <br /> <br /> Love,<br /> BlueBlue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-25039277890375866922013-12-20T16:35:00.002-08:002013-12-20T16:35:30.165-08:00FOX NEWS, please shut the fuck up.<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">I
admittedly and proudly get all of my news from comedians. They're the
only people telling the truth as far as I'm concerned. But that's not
the point. The point is all this hoopla about Christians, Christianity,
and Christmas. Here goes something I think:<br /> <br /> If the popular
representation of Christianity weren't so extremely white, blond, blue
eyed, racist and delusional, majority culture would tak<span class="text_exposed_show">e
what was said more seriously. Everyone speaking on behalf of
Christianity in popular media look to the rest of us like the kind of
people you want to generally avoid in daily life...you know, those
people...when they start talking you suddenly remember that you have
somewhere else to be, something else to do, or in desperate scenarios,
you'll just go on a rant about the bonfire of aborted fetuses and Bibles
that you and your family danced and sang around last night just before
having sex with each other.<br /> <br /> It seems that because of racism,
homophobia, and overall closed-mindedness, Christianity is looking very
one dimensional and completely insane to the majority of Americans.
Though I am no longer a Christian for all intents and purposes, I am
absolutely respectful of the religion and practice as a way to find
balance in one's life...or salvation from sins...whatever rhetoric you
need to use to get into heaven. However, for the sake of all Christians
in America who don't necessarily want to be perceived as brainwashed
delusional lunatics, Fox News, I plead to you: <br /> <br /> SHUT THE FUCK UP! Your audience is getting smaller and crazier...and it shows.<br /> <br /> Love,<br /> Blue</span></span>Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-88530312253653552013-12-18T13:54:00.003-08:002013-12-18T13:54:52.298-08:00My Human Being: Why I'm Not Doing a Damn Thing<br />
<div>
</div>
<div class="_6mc">
<span><div class="_cv7 fsm fwn fcg">
<a href="https://www.facebook.com/blueazu/posts/10100368778921214"><abbr class="timestamp livetimestamp" data-utime="1387398542" title="Wednesday, December 18, 2013 at 12:29pm"></abbr></a></div>
</span></div>
<br />
<div class="_6nm userContentWrapper" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">
<div class="userContent">
Most
of the "we're Black and living in an oppressed state and therefore we
should represent ourselves better to create better communities"
literature and banter comes from the perspective that I should have to
DO something to be a good black person. I used to be a doer. I did all
kinds of things. In fact, I got awarded and praised for all the shit I
did. But doing shit left me tired, unfulfilled, jaded, and overall
pissed at everybody who didn't appreciate the shit I did. So I have
changed my perspective.<br /> <br /> These days, I don't believe in doing
anything. In fact, I believe that doing less enables my true nature to
emerge. The less I do, the more beautiful the world looks, as it is
allowed to be itself without my influence...so I get to see the
world...not my imposition on the world. <br /> <br /> Also, doing nothing
saves energy for me to do what I want to do when I want to do it. I only
like to do a few things: cook, make music, and take baths. Everything
else is either me preparing to cook, make music, take baths, or cleaning
up from cooking, making music and taking baths. When I'm doing shit I
don't want to do, I wanna get it done asap so I can spend more time not
doing a damn thing.<br /> <br /> So what's your point Blue? My point is
this: real freedom is not having to do a damn thing...especially not for
a damn body else...to justify existing in my skin. Real freedom is my
human being.<br /> <br /> Love,<br /> Blue</div>
</div>
Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-10849268152468767582013-11-28T11:02:00.000-08:002013-11-29T11:02:30.275-08:00Holiday ExpectationsGreetings everyone. As we head out to our various dinner locations, let's take a moment to acknowledge our expectations. <br /> <br /> 1. As a youngster in these mean, mean streets, I remember getting scolded by various adults for being an "embarrassment" at Thanksgiving. Well, chances are, those adults had expectations of how I was supposed to act on Thanksgiving and those expectations were in place to establish impressions among others. Generally, if someone is capable of embarrassing someone else, the underlying belief is that the embarrassing person is a "reflection" of the embarrassed. To chastise and criticize an embarrassing person is, therefore, to chastise and criticize a reflection of self. So don't wait until the holiday party to care about your reflection. Model good behavior consistently throughout the year and your reflection will not be an embarrassment. <br /> <br /> 2. I used to play out in my head the way social circumstances would transpire. As a result, my social anxiety would increase drastically and by the time the social circumstance was underway, I was a reckless mess and the experience was exhausting and unpleasant. In hindsight, had I done the same things, but not prematurely created a non-existing social circumstance based on my expectations of what should happen, things would have gone smoother. So I live in the moment. Nothing goes as planned. Things go as they go. I keep my head in the game so I don't burn the food.<br /> <br /> 3. If your family or friend group is anything like mine, there are a lot of big personalities with different points of view. So what? I lock away all my weapons, pad anything with a sharp edge or tip, and let her rip. It is not my responsibility to protect anyone from anyone else...including themselves. And if I don't feel safe, there is a whole world full of trees, grass, streets, sidewalks, and city wilderness to walk around in for hours if I choose. I am not bound to any circumstance no matter what anybody else thinks. <br /> <br /> 4. People might die. It's no one's fault. When it's your time to go, it's just your time to go. <br /> <br /> So now that we've acknowledges some expectations, we can take a moment to reset and enjoy the simple things...like cranberry sauce. Oh, and here's a lovely Holiday Tune by Yours Truly to usher in the spirit of Thanksgiving. HAPPY THANKSGIVING! <br /> <br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Blue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7123126921110090391.post-71366367204870673132013-11-26T14:08:00.001-08:002013-11-26T14:08:59.442-08:00Does My Happiness Make You Uncomfortable?There are a lot of people in the world who have a lot of pain and shame
associated with being gay. As a new convert into the happy life, I tried
to adapt the pain...you know, wanting to fit in with others who
identify with me now, as though I changed...but whatever...<br /> <br /> But
I couldn't. I even tried to care what other people would think if I
told them, but I couldn't. I tried to be nervous when telling friends,
but that didn't make sense. Most of my friends were happy and even the
ones who weren't were artsy new agey people who accepted everybody. So
every time I told a friend, they'd say "Congratulations! I wish you
happiness!" As a result, my experience was not as dramatic or life
altering as I'd hoped it would be. Again, too much made for TV cinema
during my formative years.<br /> <br /> There seems to be an expectation for
happy people to "come out of the closet." I just don't feel that need. I
guess it's because I never was in a closet. I dated men, I liked dating
men. Now I'm with a woman. It was a life change. There was some
leftover church chatter in my brain, but I was already pretty much
broken from that as a result of my transition out of indoctrination and
into what I really thought. So maybe there is a "coming out of the
closet" of sorts: The closet of being molded by the world I was in into
something that doesn't make sense to me and then slowly navigating my
way out in order to have a life that doesn't raise my cholesterol, make
my skin break out, and lead to hypertension...<br /> <br /> Trying to make
sense of the senseless is a full time job. Not to knock what makes sense
to others or their experiences, but my life is not about them. It's
about me. And the indoctrination that I experienced does not make sense
to me. It didn't when I was in it and now that I'm out, I can look back
and see why I thought I was a bad person: because I could not be what I
was "supposed" to be, no matter how hard I tried or how many zits and
doctor visits I had. Not to mention that even though my indoctrinators
knew what perfection was, none of them could demonstrate it. That was
frustrating. <br /> <br /> Love,<br /> BlueBlue Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359417326586280432noreply@blogger.com0