Saturday, April 27, 2013

Recognizing Growth Part 1: The Manager. Before and After.

Before the Manager:

I hate cell phones! Sometimes, I'll go 2-3 days without answering mine because there's always someone on the other end asking me to do something that I don't want to do. Or worse, asking me why I haven't done something that they thought I was supposed to but was never planning to do because I didn't want to, but I didn't tell them I wasn't gonna do it so they assumed I would do it but they never offered me any money to do it and they just said it would be nice if I did it and I was like, maybe it would be nice, but I didn't tell them I wasn't gonna do it so they thought I was just gonna do what they expected me to do and I didn't and now they callin' me askin' me why I didn't do something that they coulda done themselves or got somebody else to do cuz they don't even know me like that to be askin' me for a bunch of favors and I don't like them anyway so I actually intended to not do what they askin me to do so they don't ever call me again for nothin!

Know what else I hate? Phone talkin friends who think that friendship is equal to the number of minutes you spend talking to somebody on the damn phone so they keep on talkin and you be tryin to get off the phone and be creatin drama in the background and askin friends to scream and make a bunch of noise and bangin pots and pans together so you can have an excuse to get off the phone but they steady talkin like you ain't got a life goin' on on the other side of the phone and all you wanna do for the next 30 minutes is sit up and talk to them and they not even in the room and they ain't got nothin' important to say. Or worse, family members that I don't even like but I won't just be like "stop callin' me you dirty whore trash!" because then they'll start gettin' all mad and tellin' the rest of the family that I don't love them and startin a bunch of drama and having my cuzins and aunts and uncles callin' me tellin me I need to be nicer and stop callin' people all kinds of whores and trash like I don't know that you ain't supposed to call people whores and trash unless you don't want to talk to them anymore, but get this...I didn't want to talk to them anymore and then you end up seeing them at Christmas and they wanna know why you don't like them and then you gotta come up with some reason cuz, "I just don't like you" ain't a good enough reason not to like somebody but I don't wanna be all up in the middle of the Christmas dinner table tellin' them about themselves in front of everybody about how every time they open they mouth they complainin about they busted knee or house foreclosure or they broke and got a venereal disease and they children are doin' this and that but then they drive away in a Escalade and it ain't like I can even help them cuz I'm broke too but I be handelin' my bizness and I know I can't afford no Escalade and I ain't drivin one neither.

ahem...So, I suppose that the underlying interpretation of my disdain for mobile communication devices stems from the desire to remain autonomous and otherwise undisturbed. I propose that if it were harder to get access to individuals (i.e., me), communications would be of greater quality and lesser frequency. It stands to reason that if humans reverted back to using only written communication strategies, via electronic means or paper and pen/pencil, the world would be a better place.

After the Manager
La la la. La la lala. La la la. La la lala. Uranus Is Blue. Fuck these hos. La la la. La la lala! 

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